Ever feel like you’re doing everything right at work but still no one’s following your lead? It’s not you. (Well, it is… but in the best way.) Leadership isn’t about barking orders or being the busiest person in the room—it’s about how you show up.
Let’s talk about five simple mindset shifts that’ll turn you from “just the boss” into a leader your team actually wants to follow.
1. Reframe the Failure:
Every Friday, I run a “Reframe” activity with my team. I toss out a not-so-great scenario and ask them to turn it into a growth opportunity. Why? Because failure is never the end—it’s data. If you’re still learning, you’re still leading.
2. Use Assertive Communication (Not the Loudest Voice):
Assertiveness doesn’t mean you win every argument. It means people understand you. Try this: “I feel overwhelmed when priorities shift last minute. I need more notice to do my best work.” Honest, clear, and kind? That’s trust on a silver platter.
3. Master Active Listening:
Use the PAR method—Pause, Acknowledge, Respond. When you stop waiting to speak and start listening to understand, magic happens. Even a 5-second pause can signal “I’m all in.” It might feel awkward, but it builds rapport faster than any team-building event ever could.
4. Spread Gratitude Like Confetti:
Start meetings with three things you appreciate. Celebrate tiny wins. Say “thank you” for real effort. It’s contagious. Positivity boosts morale—and keeps you from turning into the stressed-out overlord of doom.
5. Embrace Curiosity Like a Toddler:
Your title doesn’t make you the smartest person in the room. Ask questions. Buy $5 books on weird topics. Show your team you’re still growing—and invite them to grow with you.
One final thought: leadership isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present. Show your team what growth looks like. Be the leader who isn’t afraid to learn in public.
Now go write three thank-you messages this week and make someone’s day. You never know who’s following your example.